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Say What ???

We say some of the silliest things. I don’t know if we’re trying to look smarter for some reason, or if we are trying to blend in and be hip, or just use commonly heard phrases because it’s easier than thinking about what we say??? When you look back at our use of the English language, we say a lot of very odd things. In fact, people like George Carlin; “I’m not getting ON the plane-I’m getting IN the plane,” Bill Engvall's “Here’s your sign,” and Jeff Foxworthy’s “You might be a redneck,” have made careers out of people using stupid phrases or crazy things we say and do.

Today I want to focus on those phrases we, and others, commonly use, that quite frankly don’t make much sense. Giving credit to numerous on-line dictionaries, here are the ones that stand out to me:

First off, the commonly used phrase; “to be honest.” REALLY, are you saying you normally are not honest …or… that you might think I would prefer to hear the dishonest version? I use this phrase all the time – WHY?!?! Why do we say such things?

What about; “before you know it?” How is that even possible, because I won’t know that anything happened, until I actually know it - kind of makes your head spin when you really think about it!

Why when we’re in a restaurant, and the waiter or waitress ASKS us what we would like to order, do we then go about ASKING them if we can order whatever? They ask us what we want, and we then ask them if we can have something – two questions with zero answers. The waiter/waitress should then answer yes or no, when we ask if we can have, whatever. Then we would be stuck and have to start the whole sequence over again. 😊

Here are some other phrases that frankly make no sense:

  • It went over like a lead balloon.

  • Thank God I’m an atheist.

  • We are not anticipating any emergencies.

  • Free advice is worth what you paid for it.

  • I’m not going to say, “I told you so.”

  • May I ask a question?

  • This report is filled with omissions.

  • Click the 'Start' button to shut down the computer.

  • Spontaneity is good as long as it is controlled.

Many famous or infamous people have uttered such crazy phrases as well. My favorite was always Yogi Berra, who once said; “When you come to the fork in the road, take it,” and of course his most famous statement; “It ain’t over ‘til it’s over!” Yogi made so many great statements that they are commonly referred to as “Yogi-isms.” Here are a few from a variety of people that stand out:

  • I am a deeply superficial person. - Andy Warhol

  • Of course, I can keep secrets. It’s the people I tell them to that can’t keep them. -

Anthony Haden-Guest

  • She used to diet on any kind of food she could lay her hands on. - Arthur Baer

  • I distinctly remember forgetting that. - Clara Barton

  • You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap. - Dolly Parton

  • The budget was unlimited, but I exceeded it. - Donald Trump

  • I have a terrible memory. I never forget a thing. - Edith Konecky

  • I hate people but I love gatherings. - Edna St. Vincent Millay

  • Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history. - George Bernard Shaw

  • Always be sincere, even when you don’t mean it. - Irene Peter

  • Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so. - Josh Billings

  • We must believe in free will. We have no choice. - Isaac B. Singer

  • I can resist everything but temptation. - Oscar Wilde

  • It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. -

Mark Twain

  • I can believe anything, provided that it is quite incredible. - Oscar Wilde

  • The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. - W.C. Fields

  • I always avoid prophesying beforehand because it is much better to prophesy after the event has already taken place. - Winston Churchill

  • I never said most of the things I said. - Yogi Berra

  • Why don’t you pair ‘em up in threes? - Yogi Berra

Here are some other statements which have been attributed to movie producer Samuel Goldwyn:

  • A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

  • Include me out.

  • A hospital is no place to be sick.

  • Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.

  • Don't worry about the war. It's all over but the shooting.

  • Gentlemen, I want you to know that I am not always right, but I am never wrong.

  • Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day.

  • If I could drop dead right now, I’d be the happiest man alive!

  • It’s more than magnificent-it’s mediocre.

  • If Roosevelt were alive, he’d turn over in his grave.

  • I’ll give you a definite maybe.

  • If you fall and break your legs, don’t come running to me.

  • I never put on a pair of shoes until I’ve worn them five years.

  • I don’t think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.

  • I was always an independent, even when I had partners.

  • I paid too much for it, but it’s worth it.

  • I can give you a definite perhaps.

  • It's absolutely impossible, but it has possibilities.

  • Our comedies are not to be laughed at.

  • I never liked you, and I always will.

  • Spare no expense to save money on this one.

  • The scene is dull. Tell him to put more life into his dying.

  • Tell them to stand closer apart.

  • When told his son was getting married: Thank heaven. A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.

  • We’re overpaying him, but he’s worth it.

Regardless of who says it, or why, we do make some really odd and silly statements. There are numerous reasons why but only each of us knows how or why we choose the words or phrases we do. I just know I’m right there with you as I use crazy phrases as much as anyone – I think I just feel my mouth has to communicate even when it does it faster than my mind. 😊

Hope you got a chuckle out of these. They are almost exactly what I wanted to share with you. I literally would go to the ends of the earth to bring a little smile to your faces. Because I have been an expert at being an amateur writer, all of my known life. I'm just saying--- 😊SMILE!!! 😊😊😊😊

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